Hear the Messages If You Dare
by Bloom Flower
Summary: One by one, the Yugioh cast experiences the terror that lurks behind their answering machines left in their messages...


Random story right here! Just trying my shot at this kind of new random plot line convoy story… Oh well, as random as ever. The "beeping" in this story is NOT foul language. Enjoy and RR please! OOC possible!

Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh.

Warnings: Weirdness…

"Speaking"

'Thoughts'

Chapter One: Seto Kaiba, Tall as the Great Pyramid

As sunlight poured through the huge transparent windows, Seto Kaiba, CEO of Kaiba Corp, opened his eyes. He swiftly got up and got dress. After his morning tasks, he went over to his answering machine. He had quite a lot of messages considering he almost never answer the phone. Kaiba pressed the tiny black button on the far right for the welcoming message left for the callers.

"Hello, this is Mokuba Kaiba. Seto's not here right now because he's so busy all the time. So busy he doesn't have time for me! I hate you, Seto! You always throw me out every time I come into you office! You know how much my head hurt every time I hit the wall because you threw me out? You are so evil! I dislike you, Seto Kaiba! I love you, big brother! One more thing, I hope you burn, Seto! You are so evil! Seto, if you're hearing this, no offence. I hate you! Oh and leave a message and I'm running away from you, you big creep!"

O.o;; So this is what Mokuba leaves as a message for the answering machine callers… Can it be that long? In this story, it can.

Seto stared out the open door to his office and yelled out in the hall, "Hiding in your room is not considered running away!"

Mokuba stick his head out of his room down the hall. "So?" And he slams the door.

Suddenly the machine beeped for the first message left behind.

Ryou's voice crackled through the machine. "Um, Kaiba? I wanted to say hi and stuff. I know you don't care but hey, who cares? Oh and-"

His voice was cut off by stomping in the background. Kaiba continues to stare.

"Bakura! Stop making so much noise! I don't care if you're playing "Stomp the Cockroach"! They're going to be stomp to extinction and my ears are going to fall out if you don't stop it! I'm trying to annoy Kaiba!" yelled Ryou in the background over the noise.

More stomping was heard in the background and Kaiba heard Bakura's voice. "Hey, these cockroaches look like pieces of chocolate with legs! And annoying Kaiba is my job! You can't steal it!"

Ryou's voice shot out of the machine into the CEO's ears. "No Bakura! Bad Bakura! Put them down! Don't pick them up! Put the cockroaches down! They didn't do anything to you! They belong on the ground with their guts STILL INSIDE their body, not outside gushing everywhere! Hey! Hey!" Beep, beep, beep.

o.O;; The CEO kept staring at the machine then, pressed the button for the next message. Then, Joey's voice crackled to life.

"Hello, Kaiba! How are you doing? No wait! What the? Why am I asking him that? I don't care how he's doing! Just hope it is bad or something. So Kaiba… Did your company burn down yet?"

"Joey!" yelled a voice in the background which was clearly Yugi's. "That's mean!"

"Yugi, didn't you see him? I mean, the guy has hair ten times the size of his head! And besides, he's like the Great Pyramid of Egypt in human form or something! You see how tall he is? Now if only he'll look like that sphinx…"

"Joey, you know there are a Great Pyramid and a sphinx? I'm so happy for you!" squealed Yugi as footsteps were made in the background getting closer with each step.

"Yugi… I can't….breathe…no more…hugging…" Beep, beep, beep.

'So he gives him a hug,' thought Seto as he shudders at the thought. Suddenly his ears picked up a tiny voice.

"Huh?" The CEO looked around his office but found nothing.

"Down here, Mr. Kaiba!"

He looked down at his feet and there stood his secretary. "Oh."

"Please hold on, Mr. Kaiba. I need to get my trusty ladder!" She yelled at him as she ran outside and reappeared a moment later.

Kaiba stared in silence as the secretary put up her ladder and started climbing up. "Geez, Mr. Kaiba! You're as tall as the Great Pyramid of Egypt! You know how hard it is to talk to you every time?"

Kaiba's eyebrow started twitching uncontrollably.

Finally, she reached the top and stopped. "I just wanted to say you have a whole bunch of messages on your answering machine."

"I know that," he said. The sound and wind knocked the secretary off her ladder and she felled off.

"Are you okay!" asked the CEO. 'Cause she's the only one who would take this job!' he thought.

"Oh I'm okay! I only broke a couple of fingers this time! Good thing your shoe broke my fall!"

She quickly took her ladder and left the room before "Humpty Dumpty falls off the ladder again."

Seto managed to press the seemingly never ending messages.

"Kaiba? It's Serenity. I apologized for my brother's rudeness earlier-"

Another voice butted in and cut her off. "Serenity? Sis, don't apologize to that jerk! He won't be able to hear it under all that hair on his head anyways let alone hear it from so high up!"

"Joey, I know that! Did you see his anti-gravity coat? I can never get those things! If it's anti-gravity, then won't he float to the moon or something? Cause if he do… I'm the new ruler of Kaiba- I mean, Wheeler Corp!"

Then, Serenity laughed an inhuman and evil laugh in the background.

"Sis, I didn't know you can laugh like that."

"Quiet, you fool! I shall send you to the deepest shadows where it shall feast on your mortal soul! Feel my wrath, mortals!" she yelled as she still holds the receiver.

Suddenly, Serenity's voice was cut and the machine made another loud beeping sound and a new voice started up.

"Kaiba?" It's Malik Ishter. "It's me, Malik-"

"Oh skip the introduction, Malik! Can I send him flying yet?" asked a impatient Marik in the background.

"No! And stop asking me!"

"How about now?"

"No!... Look out the window, Marik! Dead bird's flying!"

"Where!"

Frantic footsteps echo in the background. "Look at the dead bird flying, Malik!"

Eventually, Marik did see a bird flying in the air outside. "Birdie! Come back!"

Without warning, there was a loud crash sound of glass breaking. "Marik! Kaiba, I have to get back to you. Marik jumped out the window again! That's the third one this week! I don't know if I should keep using the dead bird thing, he always jumps out the window afterwards… Marik! Drop from the bird right now! The bird's going to die if you keep choking it! Bye, Kaiba, my yami's riding a "dead" bird." Beep, beep, beep.

o.O;;

'Note to self, never attempt to hear messages again,' Kaiba thought, 'Maybe one more won't hurt.'

He pressed for the next one.

"It's Ryou again. Sorry about Bakura earlier. Cockroach's guts are everywhere now… Anyways, I just call to annoy you and- Bakura! Stop setting fire to the trashcans! What did I say about trying to barbecue me and the house! Stop it! If you don't, we're going to be homeless before you can say, "Shadow realm"!

"Shadow realm."

"Oh… Anyways, stop trying to set fire to stuff! This is getting out of hand! First the cockroaches and now the trashcans! THEY DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO YOU!"

"It kept overflowing!"

"That's cause you're to lazy to take out the trash! And I'm trying to talk to Kaiba!"

"Hey, Ryou, Barney's on."

"Barney? Yay! Why didn't you tell me? I missed five whole seconds of it!"

"Hey, no way. I want to watch Snow White!"

"No, Bakura! It's my turn!"

There was a loud crank as Ryou dropped the receiver and started to fight Bakura for the remote.

After a second or so, the machine started beeping showing the message is over.

But then the machine's light lit up, declaring it was about to record another message. 'Oh no. No more messages! I'm answering this one!' thought the brown haired teen as he picked up the receiver before the answering machine can record the message.

"Hello? Kaiba? What's up?" said a cheery voice. It was Yugi…. Bad mistake…

Seto quickly looked up and turned his focus back on the phone with Yugi.

"The ceiling!" And he slams the receiver down.

O.o;;

End of Chapter One

Well? Told you it was weird…. Which one of the messages did you liked best? Oh and did you get the last joke about the ceiling? Oh and the title, "Hear the Messages" is the name of this story cause you hear the messages…right? Please RR!

Credits: The 'dead bird' thing was my best friend's idea so I do not own it. Also credits are given to her. Thank you.

Malik: No birds and windows were harmed during the making of this story.

Ryou: And no cockroaches and trashcans too. Barney's on!

Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, or anything else. Thank you.


End file.
